Joe's Cafe
Alexandria, South Dakota
Joe's is a stone's throw from Exit 344 of Interstate 90, the longest interstate highway in the United States. The cafe is attached to a Sinclair gas station. In the photo, the cafe is over to the right. I have fond childhood memories of Sinclair mainly because I was a big fan of "Dino"its brontosaurus logo. Sinclair gas stations exited the East many years ago so it was fun to see them in the Midwest.
Joe's is a stone's throw from Exit 344 of Interstate 90, the longest interstate highway in the United States. The cafe is attached to a Sinclair gas station. In the photo, the cafe is over to the right. I have fond childhood memories of Sinclair mainly because I was a big fan of "Dino"its brontosaurus logo. Sinclair gas stations exited the East many years ago so it was fun to see them in the Midwest.
I knew I wasn't going to be entering any foofoo cafe from the sign on the roof of the restaurant. Bud Light, a motorcycle, and a pheasant spoke volumes about the typical customer one might find in Joe's. We didn't match up with any of that but nevertheless bravely approached the front door.
AMBIENCE: Upon entering the restaurant you find yourself in a narrow room that had three small tables strung across one side and three bar tables placed directly across a narrow aisle from the small tables. A few locals sat at the bar tables drinking coffee and wondering who the hell were these strangers. I spotted what appeared to be a large dimly lit dining room attached to what had now become apparent to me as the social center of Joe's. We headed to the dining room. All the tables were empty. We were the only ones in the room. Or were we? Many eyes were staring at us in the muted light. We were being observed by a number of steel-eyed and hushed local characters. All of them were dead.
Coming out of the wall, one after the other, on all four walls, was the prolific work of a local taxidermist. I counted 14 male elk and deer, a fox (gender unknown), and a fish. The Healthy One let it be known that "this is sort of creepy".
Under the gaze of 32 glass eyes we chose a table. It is a little disconcerting to have a couple of large animals peering over your shoulder as you peruse the menu. I decided that instead of feeling ill at ease I would treat these South Dakota fauna as my breakfast companions.
To my right was this guy who had had an unremarkable life but seemed content and was a good listener.
To my left was this fellow who was a bit on the rambunctious side and liked to talk politics.
I felt pleased with my new found friends as I began to decide what I would order for breakfast. The Healthy One wondered if South Dakota had any mental institutions.
Toward the end of our meal there was considerable noise coming from the room we first entered. It looked like all the seats were filled on each side of the aisle, the locals were sipping their Midwest coffee, and a rapid crossfire of conversation about farm machinery was taking place.
4 1/2 out of 5 stars for its unconventionality (at least to us).
FOOD: I was now on my 35th state and I hadn't had chicken fried steak. The dish is closely associated with the state of Texas but I had opted for something else when we had our Texas breakfast. This was a dish that should make any gastroenterologist shudder. My tolerance for fried food has been steadily going downhill since I turned 45. I had been avoiding fried food as much as possible so I could sleep at night without chugging anti-acid tablets. Still, I felt I needed to eat chicken fried steak once to broaden my culinary breakfast experience. This seemed as good a time as any to take the plunge. I looked for affirmation from my friends on the wall and they all seemed noncommittal but I decided to go for it anyways.
Chicken fried steak contains no chicken. It is usually a cheaper cut of steak, like cube steak, that is battered and pan fried and then topped with gravy made from the pan drippings. It is so named because the cooking process is similar to how southern fried chicken is prepared. Chicken fried steak is not health food. The chicken fried steak served at Denny's has 940 calories and 56 grams of fat. The smaller chicken fried steak at Cracker Barrel has 600 calories and 45 grams of fat. I knew I was treading on dangerous health ground but that hadn't stopped me before. Just to totally pile on, the dish came with a couple of scrambled eggs, toast, and hash browns.
The chicken fried steak was as good as you would expect something laden with calories and fat. I thought the batter to steak ratio was a little on the high side. The meat was a little tough but the gravy did an outstanding job of covering up the lesser quality of the steak. The hash browns were awesome. Even though they covered almost half the plate, I could have eaten another portion. The eggs were eggs, nothing remarkable.
Joe's menu wasn't doing The Healthy One any favors. The best she could do was french toast. She declared her order as "pretty decent".
Chicken fried steak contains no chicken. It is usually a cheaper cut of steak, like cube steak, that is battered and pan fried and then topped with gravy made from the pan drippings. It is so named because the cooking process is similar to how southern fried chicken is prepared. Chicken fried steak is not health food. The chicken fried steak served at Denny's has 940 calories and 56 grams of fat. The smaller chicken fried steak at Cracker Barrel has 600 calories and 45 grams of fat. I knew I was treading on dangerous health ground but that hadn't stopped me before. Just to totally pile on, the dish came with a couple of scrambled eggs, toast, and hash browns.
Joe's menu wasn't doing The Healthy One any favors. The best she could do was french toast. She declared her order as "pretty decent".
4 out of 5 stars.
COFFEE:
It was Midwest coffee (see Ohio report).
2 out of 5 stars
SERVICE: The woman who met us in the dining room was obviously not pleased we had arrived. She slapped down the menus on the table, asked if we wanted coffee, and left without saying another word. The Healthy One leaned over and whispered to me that "we may have finally met a person in the Midwest who is actually grumpy". I didn't want to risk retribution by taking the woman's photo, but her demeanor looked like this:
I'm no Dr. Phil but I felt that I should address this situation head on. When she returned with our coffee I said, "You don't look very happy today". That's all it took. For the next few minutes she unburdened herself of her woes. She was upset because she was working all by herself that morning; taking the orders, making the coffee, cooking the food, serving the food, and cleaning the dishes. Her husband (who may have been Joe) was off elk hunting for 7 days. This confession was catharsis. We also commiserated. From then on she was a different person; friendly and caring.
4 out of 5 stars
.
I'm no Dr. Phil but I felt that I should address this situation head on. When she returned with our coffee I said, "You don't look very happy today". That's all it took. For the next few minutes she unburdened herself of her woes. She was upset because she was working all by herself that morning; taking the orders, making the coffee, cooking the food, serving the food, and cleaning the dishes. Her husband (who may have been Joe) was off elk hunting for 7 days. This confession was catharsis. We also commiserated. From then on she was a different person; friendly and caring.
4 out of 5 stars
A FEW WORDS ABOUT ALEXANDRIA:
Alexandria is very small with a population of 626. Its smallness is matched by its lack of diversity. According to the Census Bureau, the town is 98% white. Residents have to drive 15 miles for groceries or to see a doctor but the town does have a bank, post office and a couple of saloons. And yes it has a co-op grain elevator. This is pheasant hunting country and the local Granite Springs Lodge caters to the hunters. Perhaps the most interesting place in Alexandria is the Monastery of Our Mother of Mercy and its 14 or so Carmelite nuns. If you imagine that life in Alexandria could be a little boring, this convent magnifies the boredom outside its doors to an extreme degree. The nuns are not allowed to leave the premises. They have pretty much cut all ties with family and friends and live much of their life in silence. They fast half the year, never eat meat and do other penances including sleeping on a slab of wood. To be fair, I suppose to the cloistered nuns, a life of prayer and devotion is not at all boring its just that I would rather be eating bacon.
BURN THOSE BREAKFAST CALORIES OFF:
Alexandria is very small with a population of 626. Its smallness is matched by its lack of diversity. According to the Census Bureau, the town is 98% white. Residents have to drive 15 miles for groceries or to see a doctor but the town does have a bank, post office and a couple of saloons. And yes it has a co-op grain elevator. This is pheasant hunting country and the local Granite Springs Lodge caters to the hunters. Perhaps the most interesting place in Alexandria is the Monastery of Our Mother of Mercy and its 14 or so Carmelite nuns. If you imagine that life in Alexandria could be a little boring, this convent magnifies the boredom outside its doors to an extreme degree. The nuns are not allowed to leave the premises. They have pretty much cut all ties with family and friends and live much of their life in silence. They fast half the year, never eat meat and do other penances including sleeping on a slab of wood. To be fair, I suppose to the cloistered nuns, a life of prayer and devotion is not at all boring its just that I would rather be eating bacon.
After saying our goodbyes to the crew in Joe's dining room we headed down to Yankton SD which lies on the Missouri River. We walked across the river on the lower deck of the Meridian pedestrian bridge to Nebraska and returned to South Dakota on the upper deck. The half mile bridge is the longest pedestrian bridge in America connecting two states. We then took a long walk on the Auld-Brokaw trail. The 2.75 mile trail was named for Yankton's most famous couple, Tom Brokaw and his wife Meredith Auld Brokaw. The Brokaws contributed a substantial sum of money to the building of the trail. Finally, we walked 3 miles round trip from our hotel in West Point, Nebraska to our dinner restaurant. When we first entered our hotel room it felt really stuffy so we were delighted we could open the windows and air the place out. The breeze was so pleasant, we left the windows open when we left for dinner. Sometime during our time away the wind turned direction and our hotel was in the direct aromatic path of a nearby feed lot. This wind shift resulted in a wind shit in our room. For once, the Healthy One couldn't blame me for these odoriferous emanations.
October 13, 2017
NEXT UP: NEBRASKA
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